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New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 26, 2010 07:53PM

Evening team!

Moving to the area as i have a job in Newhaven, and have been told that it is near Brighton so i thought i'd come and say hi!

Is it any good like?

By the Sea, innit?!

Chris

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: !!11oneone
Date: July 27, 2010 10:34AM

I can't see the word Newhaven without my mind inserting the letters lys in the middle, turning it into Newlyshaven.

Hello, and welcome. Where are you moving from? Are you going to live in Newhaven? Married? Single? Gay? Necrophiliac? Children? (I mean do you have any, not do you want to fuck them).

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 27, 2010 10:39AM

Hey Chris, I'm the tall guy here. Don't go trying to steal my thunder! Smile with tongue out

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 27, 2010 11:38AM

I'm 6.5", which means I am tall too Having said that, neither of us are called Chris, so he's perfectly entitled to call himself 'Tallchris'. It's not like he called himself 'Tall Underscore' is it?

Fuck sake.

Welcome to nearly Brighton Chris. I'm afraid Newhaven is neither new, nor a haven of any kind. It is ruddy well rank.

Thumbs down

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 27, 2010 12:13PM

welcome tallchris,


i don't live, work or have anything to do with brighton


but that doesn't stop me be an annoying cunt

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 27, 2010 12:19PM

Kinners, you are not 6' 5" - NO WAY!

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 27, 2010 12:19PM

Way

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 27, 2010 12:30PM

he ain't 6'5", not never



*cue strawberry blond defence

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 27, 2010 12:36PM

*Sigh*

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 27, 2010 12:44PM

anyway, where's tallchris?

prolly only reads this after supper, not exactly interactive

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 27, 2010 12:46PM

He's prolly at work on the big boat that goes from Newhaven to the French Frances and back every day. He won't get home till about 11 tonight and after he takes his apron and hat off he will doubtless log on and read all the messages from his new chums.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 27, 2010 12:57PM

Arf!

Although I disagree, I reckon he plays the keyboard in the Bar of the Ferry, probably called something like 'The Normandy Lounge' - Where he regales day trippers with Synth versions of such hits as 'Do you know the way to San Jose' 'Living on a prayer' and 'La Bamba'

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 27, 2010 01:11PM

..and has a wipe downable clear pvc cover on the keys, for those inevitable 'spew on the pianist moments' during a rough crossing


chris, are your ears burning?

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 27, 2010 01:30PM

"Ok everyone, grab a glass of Captain's Cocktail, as Chris will be playing Rod Stewart's classic We Are Sailing", followed by all the hits from Bryan Ferry and Katrina and The Waves, finishing up with "Rock The Boat"

Let's PARTY!

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 27, 2010 01:57PM

http://www.assistnews.net/images08/rick%20Wakeman%20on%20stage%20with%20cape.jpg

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 27, 2010 06:34PM

Evening team!

As it happens i have been to sunny birmingham to see a Steve McCurry Retrospective, as i am a right classy fucker.

I'm a chap, 35, straight, no kids, (I don't have any, nor do i want to fuck them, although i wouldnt turn down a midget/dwarf) and am not a musician in any way, except for tinkering on my old guitar....

Am moving from Shrewsbury and work as an electrician on a new something-or-other at newhaven. Something to do with recycling i think. Not sure where i'll be staying yet- the bossman will be sorting all that out but i reckon it'll be a cosy flat somewhere.... Groovy!

Is newhaven really that rank? whats up with it....?

Tallestchris.... (Paltry 6'2'')

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 27, 2010 08:03PM

tall?!


how fucking dare you, you halfling!









love,

stretch

(6'21/2")

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 27, 2010 08:26PM

To be honest, i didn't give much consideration to conducting a height questionnaire so as not to offend, but now i know how touchy you all are in Brighton about such things.

Now this is exactly the sort of feedback i need to slot right in.

Rule Number One.... No fanciful claims about my height. (If i should start a bar fight somewhere, i would hope it is over a subject with much more gravitas)

Is it too late to change my screen name?

Am considering.... Slightlytallerthanaveragechrisbutthatsnottosneeratyourheightwhateveritmaybeeithertallerorshorteryourheightisfineireallydontwanttofalloutaboutit.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 27, 2010 08:49PM

rule number two: stick resolutely to your statements, no matter how incorrect and ludicrous they are; any back pedalling is a sign of weakness and will be punished by the dark destroyer...and you don't want to meet kat down a dark alley..

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 27, 2010 08:53PM

As a gemini, i retain the right to have two completely opposing views and to believe in them both with every inch of my being.....
So hey! whats wrong with newhaven?!!!!

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 27, 2010 08:55PM

oh dear!

[www.chavtowns.co.uk]

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 27, 2010 09:15PM

This is it! posh, eh?

[www.veoliaenvironmentalservices.co.uk]

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 27, 2010 10:19PM

Not very popular locally, and that's an understatement!

[www.theargus.co.uk]

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 28, 2010 08:14AM

Large new building projects always attract objections from the nimbys....

I worked on a specialist cancer unit a couple of years ago in the grounds of a hospital and the locals were up in arms about it.

shameless bastards.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: !!11oneone
Date: July 28, 2010 10:31AM

Yeah, but you were building a unit that gives cancer to kids. You sick bastard.

Anyway, incinerators are a good thing* and anyone who says otherwise is scientifically illiterate and lacks common sense.


So... welcome to Newhaven!

*sniggers*


Don't worry, it's easy to get to Brighton if you want to meet people without webbed toes.




* provided they're not run but evil money-grabbing bastards who'd fumigate the surroundings in toxic gas to save a tenner. Oh...

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 28, 2010 10:43AM

I know sir!

To be honest, i know NOTHING about this project whatsoever- nor do i care that much, but anybody who thinks that a landfill alternative on the site of an old abbatoir is a worth complaining about really needs to get a hobby of some sort. Photography perhaps, or maybe watercolour painting...

I read in that link that some people were too late to lodge their complaints but were told that "we will still receive objections after that date" (And laugh as we wipe our arses with them!)

happy days! Can't wait.....

I rock up August the 8th

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: !!11oneone
Date: July 28, 2010 11:16AM

Now I would buy a watercolour study of the picturesque new incinerator, with the driving rain over Newhaven Harbour in the background

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 28, 2010 11:21AM

Mmm, dwarfsex.

I'm very disappointed you're not a piano player on Transmanche Ferries, but hey ho, I have a bathroom light that needs fitting, so perhaps we can both harmonise to Jane McDonald's 'Cruisealongachristmas'
whilst you re-wire for me?

No?

Ok.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 28, 2010 11:30AM

My fault....

I should have mentioned straight away that i wasnt a piano player on Transmanche Ferries... obviously that is the natural assumption that anybody would make for anybody moving to the area.

I do apologise for the confusion my sheer stupidity has caused and for the disappoint to you all

(Not making a very good impression am i?!)

I feel really stupid now....

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: !!11oneone
Date: July 28, 2010 11:39AM

Do you play the piano? Perhaps you could get an evening job?

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 28, 2010 11:41AM

As previously mentioned... I don't play the piano.

But i'll be looking for part time work also as i will have weekends free and get really bored really easily!

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: !!11oneone
Date: July 28, 2010 12:02PM

Bingo caller?

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: tallchris
Date: July 28, 2010 12:07PM

Bit random.... but yeah!

That'll do nicely!

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 28, 2010 12:33PM

[www.brightonlife.com]

Yak!

And Chris, re: Weekend work, take that that wiring job for kinners, you'll feel in now way uncomfortable as he eyes up your toolbelt.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: Kinell
Date: July 28, 2010 01:54PM

Quote:
tallchris
As previously mentioned... I don't play the piano.
But I'll be looking for part time work also as i will have weekends free and get really bored really easily!

If you get bored really easily why not look for ladies to court rather than get a part-time job?

Most men in their spare time court ladies and fuck them and watch football on the telly whilst sipping lager etc.

Do you not do the same?

I would recommend trying that before taking on more work because of getting bored.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: ______
Date: July 28, 2010 02:18PM

Read between the lines Kinners, it's you he wants.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: sickboy
Date: July 29, 2010 03:14PM

Quote:
Am moving from Shrewsbury

Oh christ, another interloper.

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Re: New to town!
Posted by: U99
Date: July 30, 2010 08:41AM

..nothing wrong with shropshire

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